Gospel-Centered Marriages for a Glorious Church, 1/4

From October 27th to the 29th, I attended the Gospel-Centered Marriages for a Glorious Church Conference in Asheville, North Carolina. I plan to do a series of four posts based on my notes from some of the messages I heard, with this being the first.

Scott Brown, an Elder at the Church I have been attending since August, spoke on Ephesians 5:14-33:

• The longest statement in the New Testament about marriage
• The classic foundational text on the roles of husbands and wives
• Gives us language to help us understand marriage and the mystery of Christ and the Church
• Shows how to prepare for marriage
• Shows what it means to be filled with the Holy Spirit 

Text of Ephesians 5:14-33 (NASB): 
^/14 For this reason ^[a]it says,
   “Awake, sleeper,
And arise from the dead,
And Christ will shine on you.”
 ¹⁵ Therefore ^[b]be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise, ^{16 [c]}making the most of your time, because the days are evil. ¹⁷ So then do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. ¹⁸ And do not get drunk with wine, ^[d]for that is dissipation, but be filled with the Spirit, ¹⁹ speaking to ^[e]one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody with your heart to the Lord; ²⁰ always giving thanks for all things in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to ^[f]God, even the Father; ^{21 [g]}and be subject to one another in the ^[h]fear of Christ.
 ²² Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord.   For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. ²⁴ But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything.
 ²⁵ Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, ²⁶ so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, ²⁷ that He might present to Himself the church ^[i]in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless. ²⁸ So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; ²⁹ for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, ³⁰ because we are members of His body. ³¹ FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND SHALL BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH. ³² This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church. ³³ Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she ^[j]respects her husband./

Three reasons for submission:

• The husband is the head of the wife
• To understand creation order
• To understand the Fall

DESIRE to submit to the Lord is the prerequisite to being a submissive wife.  Studying ecclesiology, which is the theological study of the Christian church, will help you understand what it means to be the Bride of Christ.

Other great points:

• A wife has perfect commands to follow [Holy Scripture], but the Church is the imperfect model [until the Great Day].
• Marriage is not about finding the perfect match, but reflecting the likeness of Jesus Christ.
• Know how to talk to one another without getting into provocation mode.
• A husbands sins are a part of a wife's sanctification and cleansing.
• Communication is enormously important; men must be wordsmiths, they must talk.

William Gouge Quote:
"A husband accepts what she is willing and able to do; takes notice of her goodness; cares where she lives..."

I really appreciated Elder Brown's remark that espousal and marriage is Biblical, while courtship is a convention [that will get people to the point of espousal, or not, in a God-honoring way].

Black Bean, Corn & Tomato Salad

I put together an easy and flavorful black bean, corn and tomato salad. 

Rinse and drain three cans of black beans, drain a bit of liquid from one can of corn and slice three to five small tomatoes.  After combining those ingredients in a shallow bowl, add special things to give the salad flavor and a little heat.  I added Trader Joe's wonderful Corn and Chile Salsa and pieces of fresh cilantro to my salad.

A Simple Greek Salad

On Saturday, I stopped by the State Farmer's Market to purchase ripe tomatoes, cucumbers, and a big red onion.  Using those items with food I already had in the pantry and in the fridge, I made a big Greek salad for the fellowship meal at church.  The salad consisted of romaine lettuce, tomatoes, cucumbers, red onions, black olives, feta cheese, bulgur wheat, dill, lemon juice, extra virgin olive oil with a dash of salt and pepper.  I was pleased how flavorful and colorful it was.  I used the leftover ingredients to make a couple of salads for myself this week. 

Charo Washer's Testimony

A Pensive Walk

I went for a peaceful, pensive hour-long walk in Historic Oakwood Cemetery today.  I have wanted to visit there for a while.  Although many great oak trees were uprooted by the April tornadoes, I still enjoyed the beauty of the hilly landscape.  Oakwood appears to be one of the oldest and largest cemeteries in North Carolina, dating back to 1867 with more than 1,500 graves from the Civil War and about 20,000 graves total.

Seeing the inscription: "Blessed are those who hunger and thirst after righteousness, for they will see God," was both sobering and uplifting.  After my life imploded last month, just the thought that I will have the privilege of seeing God in the Last Day brought tears to my eyes.  His mercies are new every morning and his grace is sufficient for me.  [Note: Just realized that the first inscription was actually an amalgamation of Matthew 5:6 & Matthew 5:8]

I came across another tombstone with the last name FREED and "Jesus said: I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live: And whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die." inscribed under it.  What a testimony!

I saw another tombstone engraved with a cross and the name "Liu" in English and Chinese. Flowers were planted round the grave.  Two scriptures came to mind: "There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free man, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus,"  and "All men are like grass, and all their glory is like the flowers of the field; the grass withers and the flowers fall, but the word of the Lord stands forever." 

Even if you are not a sports fan, it is impossible to graduate from NC State University without hearing the name of legendary basketball coach, Jimmy Valvano.  I spotted the grave of the late Valvano and was amazed that there was no mention of "NC State" or "championship" or "basketball" on his tombstone, but that he  simply wanted to be remembered as "devoted husband and loving father" who recommends to posterity, "take time every day to laugh, to think, to cry." 

I conclude this post with a moving inscription that I recorded.  It was dedicated to the late John W. Pike (d. 1919) from his wife Etta Pike (d. 1937): "True to His God, pure in heart, a devoted husband, a loving father, a true neighbor.  Blessed are the dead who die in the Lord.  Gone but not forgotten, we shall meet again."

"Be faithful unto death and I will give thee the crown of life."

Scripture references: Matthew 5:6, Matthew 5:8, John 11:25-26, Galatians 3:28, 1 Peter 1:24-25, Revelation 2:10

Consistency

I just want to start off this post with a praise report, Hallelujah Jesus!  At the eleventh hour, I found a place to live for the summer that meets my needs.  Still trusting the Lord for so much, after reading and listening to Proverbs 16 repeatedly, I realize that I need to trust Him for everything.  For the past two weeks especially, everyday has been a struggle to renew my mind.  I desire to define myself by God's standards revealed in the Bible alone.  I have to seek the scriptures daily to find out what that practically means so that I can truly treasure the word in my heart.

Scripture References: Romans 12:2, Proverbs 16, Psalm 119:11

Lessons Learned This Week

• When God is doubted, a hasty plan is made therewith comes ruin and lamentation.
• Examine every possible decision in light of scripture, be mindful not to passively "co-sign" on things God hates.
• There is rescue from despair and a future hope, just keep looking onwards and upwards - DON'T LOOK BACK!

Scripture references: Proverbs 21:5, Proverbs 19:2, 1 Corinthians 5:11, Luke 9:62, Luke 17:32